Monthly Archives: November 2011

6 Tips for Confident Networking

SAN FRANCISCO - JULY 20:  A job seeker receive...Are you one of those rare (and very lucky ) people who enjoys networking?  


Or are you like many others?  


Do you arrive at a networking event, look around at the sea of faces, then find yourself barraged by a stream of doubts and uncertainties.

Negative self talk tells you that you’re a fraud, everyone else in the room is just great.  There they are experienced business professionals at home in this environment.  While you are just pretending, you don’t really know what you are doing!

And on top of you’re going to forget your speech, you won’t remember anyone else’s name and there is a very good chance you will forget your own!

The “sensible” part of you tells you not to be so silly.  But there you are with these negative thoughts and anxieties in your head. 

Relax and take a deep breath, then tell your brain it has more important things to think about! 


No, you are not going to have a heart attack as you take the floor.  You’ve got this under control and here are some tips to help!  

  1. Relax, take a deep breath, and smile!  Taking in Oxygen deeply can steady nerves and lower your heart rate!  Smiling releases endorphins and makes you feel more comfortable.
  2. Practice positive self-talk.  We all have some negative thoughts.  Be conscious of them and then cut them off.  Recognize them for what they are.  Then replace them.  As you approach the event fill your head with the repeated thought that you are confident and successful;  People like you.   Tell yourself firmly that you are going to do well and that people will be impressed.  Say it very loudly and firmly in your own head.  You can say out it loud in private at home before you go as well – repeat, repeat, repeat!  
  3. Have a great elevator speech and practice it ahead of time. This is a short paragraph or two that describes who you are and what your business does.  Give it punch – make it interesting, informative, and memorable.  Practice delivering it at home with confidence and don’t rush.
  4. Be memorable. What is it about you and your business that makes you unique?  Work it out then be quite clear about it.  Don’t be afraid to tell people – make it part of your branding
  5. Have good contact material! Make sure you always have business cards with you with up-to-date contact information. It is worth investing in a good business card that you feel proud of.  They help you to feel very comfortable handing them out at networking events.
  6. Be yourself and show an interest in others. Expect people to like you – tell yourself they will.  People like people who show an interest in them, and that is what you are going to do.  Remember you are bringing them a gift – your talents and experience and there can be no one else just like you! 
Now you are ready to get started.  Off you go and enjoy your networking.    

Do you have any tips for confident networking?  I’d love to hear them!



Wendy Mason works as a Coach, Consultant and Writer. 

She works with all kinds of people going through many different kinds of personal and career change, particularly those;

 

  • looking for work
  • looking for promotion or newly promoted
  • moving between Public and Private Sectors
  • facing redundancy
  • moving into retirement
  • wanting to do a mid-life review

You can contact Wendy at wendymason@wisewolfconsulting.com  or ring ++44 (0)2084610114

Related articles
Building Self- Confidence (cmaankur.wordpress.com)
Confidence- the evidence that you can overcome any barriers (successnetwork.wordpress.com)
Unemployed – Interview Techniques – Behavioural or Competency Based Interviewing (leavingthepublicsector.blogspot.com)

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Successful Leaders Need Mental Toughness And This Is Something Anyone Can Learn

Unit cell of the diamond cubic crystal structureImage via Wikipedia


My last post said that with practice you can learn to think positively and confidently about making changes.  You   can develop a resilient mindset.  This post takes this further and offers help!

People with inborn talent may be good at what they do—but experience shows that only the mentally tough reach the highest plateaus in their field.

Mental toughness is something anyone can learn.

Director of mental training for the St. Louis Cardinals and a top-tier executive coach, Dr. Jason Selk knows everything there is to know about developing mental toughness!

Inspired on the vision of legendary basketball coach John Wooden, Dr Selk has developed a program that is as simple as it is effective.

But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.

You will have to put effort in if you are serious about being successful.  
But this is a great way to build up your mental “muscles.” 

Dr Selk provides hands-on daily exercises for breaking old, self-defeating patterns of behaviour.  You can replace them with the can-do attitude and positive behavior that would make Coach Wooden proud.

ExecutiveToughness outlines the three fundamentals for attaining high-level success:

  • ACCOUNTABILITY—admit to mistakes, correct them, and, most important, learn from them
  • FOCUS—on your strengths, on winning, on reaching your goal . . . for only 100 seconds per day
  • OPTIMISM—don’t just believe you can succeed, know you can succeed

Executive Toughness takes you through the steps of making these critical behaviours part of your everyday routine.

Practice your accountability, focus, and optimism!

Then,you’ll be on the path to attaining your goals!

Make them part of your mental “DNA” and there will be no turning back—ever.

ExecutiveToughness could be your workout for success in your career and in your life.
US Link

UK Link

Wendy Mason works as a Coach, Consultant and Writer. 


She works with all kinds of people going through many different kinds of personal and career change, particularly those;

  • looking for work
  • looking for promotion or newly promoted
  • moving between Public and Private Sectors
  • facing redundancy
  • moving into retirement
  • wanting to do a mid-life review

You can contact Wendy at wendymason@wisewolfconsulting.com  or ring ++44 (0)2084610114


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5 Ways To Make a Killer First Impression

Most people will judge you within the first second of meeting you and their opinion will most likely never change. Making a good first impression is incredibly important, because you only get one shot at it.

Princeton University psychologist Alex Todorov and co-author Janine Willis, a student researcher who graduated from Princeton in 2005 had people look at a microsecond of video of a political candidate. Amazingly, research subjects could predict with 70-percent accuracy who would win the election just from that microsecond of tape. This tells us that people can make incredibly accurate snap judgments in a tenth of a second.

How can you make sure people are judging you accurately and seeing your best side?

Read the rest of this great post at this link 5 Ways To Make a Killer First Impression (forbes.com)impression/

Wendy Mason works as a Coach, Consultant and Writer. 

She works with all kinds of people going through many different kinds of personal and career change, particularly those;

  • looking for work
  • looking for promotion or newly promoted
  • moving between Public and Private Sectors
  • facing redundancy
  • moving into retirement
  • wanting to do a mid-life review

You can contact Wendy at wendymason@wisewolfconsulting.com  or ring ++44 (0)2084610114

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Unemployed – Interview Techniques – Behavioural or Competency Based Interviewing

Interview Questions

Image by MattHurst via Flickr

STAR Stories for Optimum Success

An earlier post explained how to build your STAR stories. When faced with a Behavioural or Competency Based Interview they will serve you well.

What is Behavioural Interviewing?

Behavioural or Competency Based Interviewing is a style of interviewing that more and more organizations are using in their hiring process.

This is based on a belief that the most accurate predictor of future success is past performance in a similar situation.

So this form of interviewing is based on your experiences, the way you behave and your knowledge, skills and abilities.

Traditional interviewing questions ask you general questions such as “Tell me about yourself.”

But behavioural interviewing is much more probing.

How do Employers go about Behavioural or Competency Based Interviews?

Employers find the skills they think are necessary for the job and then ask questions to find if you have those skills.

For example, if leadership is necessary for a role, you may be asked to talk about an experience you have had as a leader and what you think makes a good leader.

In any interview you should always listen carefully to the question.

Don’t be afraid to ask for clarification if you don’t understand something.  It is better to do this than to jump in uncertain of what is needed.

How can you prepare for a Behavioural or Competency Based Interview?

When going for any interview, you should research the organization carefully. Then look at similar jobs in the same sector. You are trying to find the qualities required.  Remember to note at any qualities they mention in the advert or in the information pack.

Then find useful examples from your past and your CV/resume; times when you have demonstrated the behaviours you think the organization may be seeking.

During the interview, your responses need to be specific and detailed. Tell them about a particular situation that relates to the question, not a general one.

Outline the situation, what you did specifically and the positive results that followed.  Be certain to show clearly what you contributed.

Remember your STAR stories. Your answer should include the Situation, Task, Action and Result.

The STAR Method

  • Situation: give an example of a situation you were involved in that resulted in a positive outcome
  • Task: describe the tasks involved in that situation
  • Action: talk about the various actions involved in the situation’s task
  • Results: what results directly followed because of your actions

Interview Questions

Typically, the interviewer will then ask questions to get to the specific qualities they seek.

Sometimes this is called ”digging a well.”

The interviewer may ask you open-ended questions to allow you to choose which examples you wish to use to illustrate a particular quality. They will then ask you very specific follow-up questions. For example;

  • How did you reach that conclusion?
  • How did you manage that meeting?
  • How did handle that senior manager?

Wherever you can, be specific.

Quantify your results! Numbers illustrate your level of authority and responsibility.

Be ready to explain difficulties and how you handled them.  What did you learn when things started to go wrong and how did you bring things back on track.

Good preparation and work on your STAR stores should make you feel much more confident about handling this kind of interview.

But I would welcome comments from others about their experience of these kinds of interviews.

I will be very happy to answer any questions you have.

Wendy Mason works as a Coach, Consultant and Writer. 

She works with all kinds of people going through many different kinds of personal and career change, particularly those;

  • looking for work
  • looking for promotion or newly promoted
  • moving between Public and Private Sectors
  • facing redundancy
  • moving into retirement
  • wanting to do a mid-life review

You can contact Wendy at wendymason@wisewolfconsulting.com  or ring ++44 (0)2084610114

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The Resilient Mindset – don’t let a fixed mindset defeat you.

Cover of "Mindset: The New Psychology of ...

Don’t change – stay right where you are”!

Nobody said change was easy.  Personal change is hard, so is changing an organization.  It is uncomfortable and risky.

That is why most of us don’t change until change is forced on us.

We don’t change; even when making a change could make a huge and positive difference for us and those about us.

Most of us have a mindset that favours staying put right where we are – a “fixed” mindset. And fixed mindsets lack resilience.

Standing still and staying where we are, can present far more danger and risk in the long term than making a change.

Changing that mindset

So how do you develop a resilient mindset?

You need to learn to challenge your own thinking.

Your fixed mindset will chatter away in your head, if you let it.  It will fill your head with negativity and erode your confidence.

The nasty fixed mindset will tell you that even if you wanted to change, you can’t do it!  You’re not bright enough! Your team isn’t strong enough!  You don’t have the brains or the talent!

This time you are going to answer back. 

“Well I’m certainly bright enough – if I see the need for change, I’m bright enough to do it.  I can learn and I can find people who can advise me.  I can learn and my team can learn!”

You fixed mindset will probably answer – “But what happens if and when you fail?

So here is your defence.  “Everyone fails sometimes.  But I’ll do it well and I’ll manage the risks – so I’ve got every chance of success”

“But” says your fixed mindset, “if you don’t make the change, you can’t fail.”

“No, but, if I don’t try, I’ve failed already!

Now your fixed mindset sneers and becomes cunning.  “Oh so it is going to be easy for you then!”

You smile wryly.  “No it isn’t going to be easy.  Nothing worth having comes easy. I’m going to do it”

Back into the shadows!

If you keep beating it back, at some point your fixed mindset will slink away into the shadows.  It won’t be dead.

It may emerge occasionally when you are feeling tired or frustrated.

But you have the upper hand now.  You know you have to find the energy to take up your sword and beat it back into the shadows again.

With practice you can learn to think positively and confidently about your change.  You will develop a resilient mindset

You can do it! You can make the change you desire – it is time to start believing. Reach for your sword and begin practicing.


Wendy Mason works as a Coach, Consultant and Writer. 

She works with all kinds of people going through many different kinds of personal and career change, particularly those;

  • looking for work
  • looking for promotion or newly promoted
  • moving between Public and Private Sectors
  • facing redundancy
  • moving into retirement
  • wanting to do a mid-life review

You can contact Wendy at wendymason@wisewolfconsulting.com  or ring ++44 (0)2084610114

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